Help Your Kid to Find their Confidence at Every Stage

Updated: June 15, 2021 | Published:

If you take a look at any elementary school around the world, one of the things that will catch your eye is how many children have their hands up in front of them. They are raising their hand to answer questions and participate during class discussions without hesitation or apprehension. As they grow older though, so does the difficulty level and this can leave some children with a lack of confidence.

Apart from making assessments for boosting their confidence, there are certain self-care tips for kids that you must make your children learn and practice. Today’s effective strategy can help in boosting trust in children.

Model Confidence Yourself

As a parent, you can be the best resource for your child. Modeling confidence yourself is one of the easiest ways to teach it to them. When children see their parents or other caregivers being confident in themselves and taking risks, they will follow suit by developing more self-confidence than those who are not shown these examples on a regular basis.

As they grow older, it is important to help children keep their confidence up. With the increased difficulty levels in school and other areas of life, kids may start doubting themselves. It’s not uncommon for many adults who are successful now to say that they experienced a lack of self-confidence at one point or another too. For a child, that lack of confidence may lead to a lifetime of negative results.

Don’t Rescue Your Child

Making a choice and then executing it is a skill that many children are not exposed to. When it comes time for them to make their own decisions, they may get overwhelmed by the thought of everything that could go wrong and be left feeling like there’s no way out.

Decision Making

The best thing you can do as a parent when this happens is helping your child find a way out. Don’t rescue them, don’t tell them to give up and do something else; instead, teach your child how to navigate mistakes as part of the natural learning process.

When kids make decisions on their own they are better equipped for when things don’t go according to plan. They learn to try again and, if it’s not meant to be this time around, they know how to adjust.

Kids who are allowed to make their own decisions without being rescued by parents will develop confidence skills that last a lifetime. They might not like the results of those first few choices but as long as you don’t rescue them, they’ll learn from the experience and keep going.

Practice Attachment Parenting

Put yourself in the shoes of your child and try to identify what it is they need. As an example, if your child needs more time with you before bedtime then give them that space or provide some other form of reassurance like a gentle back-rub or foot tickle.

Talk with Child

If possible, be mindful about the way you speak to others when around your children so that you don’t inadvertently teach them that it’s okay to put others down.

Educate yourself on attachment parenting so as to know what your child needs and how to provide it.

Practice Positive Self-Talk With Them

One way to help your child build confidence is by practicing positive self-talk with them. Encourage them not only to identify their strengths but also the things they are working on improving. Ask for feedback from friends and family members about what they do well, as opposed to just concentrating on what needs work.

Confidence comes in many forms. Knowing that you’ve done your best, or coming first in a race, can be tremendously satisfying for any child. Helping them to identify their strengths and weaknesses will give them the foundation they need to build lifelong confidence and success from an early age.

Help Kids Find Their Passion

As children get older, they begin to find their own interests and passions. Helping them understand what those are can help them gain confidence in themselves as well as become more successful at whatever they choose to do.

Stop Saying “But”

The word “but” often puts a damper on the sentence before it. When your child says, “I can do this but I don’t want to,” they are really saying that they would like for you to take responsibility and make them do what needs to be done so that they wouldn’t have to do it.

A child’s confidence is built on the things they are able to handle for themselves, and “but” often distracts from putting responsibility back in their hands where it belongs. If you want to help build your child’s healthy self-confidence at every stage of development, stop saying but when he or she speaks.

Don’t Compare Them To Others

Stop comparing your child to other kids in the family, at school or to others they see on TV. If you do this in front of them and it’s not intended as a compliment, then their self-confidence will suffer because they know that they are being compared unfavorably to someone else.

The best way for children (and adults) to learn how they measure up is by comparing themselves against their own past efforts.

Final Words

Creating an environment where a child can learn to believe in themselves is important. Part of that environment includes helping your kids develop healthy self-confidence by providing them with the opportunity to experience mastery and rebound from failure, which will help build their confidence for future happiness, health, and success.


About Amy T. Smith

Amy is a mother, writer, and your go-to expert for real-life insights into parenting, health, and lifestyle. Amy holds a Master's degree in Journalism from Columbia University and prides herself on finding actionable tips and relatable tales.

Through her blog, AmyandRose, she supports you from pregnancy to the teenage years, offering assurance that your experiences are shared.

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